A sits in her room and feels that the doors are closing on her and she begins to feel suffocated. She understands that she is feeling emotionally overwhelmed and anxious and needs a diversion. She picks up her phone, scrolls through some of her apps and realizes that she wants (not needs) new shoes. In the next few minutes, she realizes that she has also ended up adding to her cart several things and is about to spend nearly 10,000/- on quite non essential things.

In similar situations of stress, B finds comfort in his kitchen or fridge at odd hours and ends up binge eating or exhausting that lot of alcohol which he wanted to preserve for an occasion.

Whereas C chooses to plan every second of the day with professional commitments, with the ongoing workplace stress and competition at the cost of ignoring several aspects of his personal life because, if he isn’t planned then being idle can make him anxious about his career.

Such behavior patterns could be common to any of us. Without even us realizing, they become part of our lifestyle. It eventually creates a maladaptive pattern of stress and difficult emotions that can have serious residual impact on us. But, such patterns are also meant to make us realize! That we need to focus on the smaller aspects of our lives, if we are to step out of the loop and acquire the right set of coping skills.

With the increasing challenges in our personal and professional lives, it is pertinent to our mental health that we develop good emotional coping skills to allow growth and transition into various phases of life quite smoothly. As quoted rightly by Kat Cole, “Focus on the things that are small enough to change but big enough to matter”. Maladaptive Coping can subject individuals to various lifestyles disorders, stress induced medical conditions and mental health issues like depression and anxiety.

All of us are capable of learning the right kind of strategies for emotional coping, and the same strategies may not be applicable to all. They are very specific to an individual’s personality. For some, spirituality could be a strong medium, whereas for others it might be fitness. However, to hit the right notes, it is important to seek mentorship with a professional psychologist. The sole aim of learning to cope – whether from certain traumatic experiences or negative experiences of the past or be ready for a challenging future ahead – is to have a fruitful present. Nothing can stop you other than your limited coping skills as “ you do not rise to the level of your goals, you fall to the level of your systems” as highlighted by James Clear. Hence, to embark on this journey, this is your opportunity to work on your systems, behavioral patterns, emotions and core beliefs! Seize it while you can, develop the right emotional coping skills and learn to be the better version of yourself! 

Our personality development and coping skills enhancement specialist is Ms Ashwini Deshpande. You can find out more and book an appointment with her here!